briefing_3 [Scoop!]

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====== Briefing 3 ======

===== Editor's Note =====

As I stare out of the window of my office and watch the lightning strike across the sky, I wonder when any of you will have a similar flash of inspiration.

There has been an improvement from many of you this week, so that is something to be pleased about. I have heard that conversations with the Minister of Finance were productive, and the recent sensationalist pieces that have been published, whilst not serious journalism, have helped sell a lot of papers.

There is still a great deal out there to be discovered though. We still don't know //why// parliament was prorogued, and it's unclear if our new Queen will have the necessary skill to succeed in the role.

It has been a bad week in the press for Argos Strand. Unfortunately, somehow our reporter missed the key fact that his most recent performance was interrupted by a falling chandelier; this error has not gone unnoticed. Please can all of you do your jobs to a bare minimum standard of competence. That shouldn't be a difficult ask.

Additionally, it has come to my attention that there is someone within New Glabe Gazette who is leaking information to our rival, the Lookout. Be vigilant and report any suspicious activity from your colleagues to me.

I believe that (most of) you all are capable of great things. Please demonstrate your talents.
===== Headlines =====

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==== Read the Captain's article in full ====
[[river_rampant_with_putrid_poisoning|River Rampant With Putrid Poisoning]]

===== Notices from Human Resources =====

  * **Reminder: Not to Exceed Your Allotted Vacation Days.** We at the New Glabe Gazette value all our employees, particularly on an hourly basis. Every hourly re-evaluation you miss is a strike on your permanent employee record, and this does not cease for annual leave, sick days, remote work whether contractually-permitted or -obligatory, or when you go home in the evenings. Give yourself the best shot at maintaining your current salary by being in the office for as long as possible! We regret that employee records are not accessible this week, and may never be if the email server continues to be down. 

  * **Invitation: to Sign Up for the Work Party Next Week.** You might be familiar with the notion that the only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary. If you are good with letters, you may also have remarked that party comes before both of these words. In keeping with this principle please consider this your cordial invitation to the New Glabe Gazette's most statistically successful welfare and team-spirit-fostering event. Please RSVP. Please. 

  * **Notice: Do You Do it Enough?** Are you noticing this notice? Prove it. Please find yours truly during the upcoming pitch meeting and confirm your notice of these notices by saying this password aloud: I HEREBY CEDE ALL STATUTORY RIGHTS ENTITLING ME TO A PENSION. Be careful: the password is case-sensitive! As for finding me, this part should be easy. Noticeably, I do //not// wear a lab coat. 

With hugs and kisses where applicable,

//from Human Resources ⋆˚✿˖°//

===== Opinion =====
==== Minister of Deception? ====
Dear reader,

Last week I revealed to you, my loyal explorers of hidden corruption and vicious lies, the depraved, tyrannical plans of the ignoble Duke of Abberfraw. Today I bring you the next development in this developing story.

Duke Abberfraw, being a member of the Upper House, has no formal power to prorogue parliament. Instead, he made use of a network of manipulation, blackmail and influence to bring about his nefarious will. But that raises a crucial question. Who else is part of this? Which spineless, greedy politicians has the Duke managed to ensnare within his web? 

Perhaps we will never know the answer in full. But I know this much, and this much I know: one of the key players, a cornerstone of the Duke’s empire, is Finance Minister Miranda Hamilton, who should be better known as the Minister of Deception! So desperate was she to hide her involvement in this mutilation of our parliamentary system, that when I confronted her with unassailable evidence of her guilt she attempted to blackmail me, blatantly, in front of the entire newsroom of the Gazette!

The Minister of Deception cannot be allowed to continue to hold high office in our country - not if we have any respect left for our institutions and laws. We must demand her removal from government, immediately and without delay! Down with the Minister of Deception! Down with the Duke!

//Written by Elis Sinclair.//

===== Puzzles =====
[[https://linktr.ee/scoop_3|{{:puzzles3.png?nolink&960|}}]]

===== Note from T. C. Strange =====

CFNZ VZBE SLBY RUGG HBXB
===== The Pragmarium =====

To celebrate the 10th anniversary of the release of Princess of the Dragons: The Two Mountain Lairs: The Complete Cinematic Edition with 18 new songs adapted from the original novel, this week's pragmarium entries are written in the style of dialogue from the franchise.

==== Konkh ====
Perhaps it's time to stop and look behind you. Gaze not 'pon the path your feet have yet to tread; gaze instead on all that thou hast done. A moment's rest, before carrying on with a smile. Lucky numbers 7, 82, 302.
==== Trapeza =====
tReasure! A time writ in the stars for one of your sort of triumph and victory, we'er far has been bought near and high has been bought low. Now gaze upon the victor's spoils, spread out as if for a feast. Lucky numbers 3, 28, 7.

==== Melanodoch ====
And why, weary writer, did you think 'twas for thee to stop ere the end? No. Much duty awaits you still, and the burden of faith that rests 'pon your shoulders shall not grow lighter for many a day yet. Lucky numbers 7, 7, 62.
==== Aegis ====
Great peril awaits thee, noble defender. Your friends shall look to you when from the sky comes mortiferous flame, and it will be with pride that you give your all unto honourable struggle. Lucky numbers 7, 9632, 7.
==== Petrad ====
Mark my words, young one. Thou art greatness clad in the littlest of things, a brilliant heaven-sent light radiant from within the littlest stone. Ere long, you will flourish and find your place amidst the garden of this world. That will not make it easier to suffer whilst thou must. Lucky numbers 7, 3, 43.
==== Kyvos ====
Atrophied 'pon the vine do the grapes of wrath fade to ash, crumbl'ing into the wind to give life anew to fields afar. I'm not really sure if you're the grapes, or the wind, or maybe the field? The stars are unclear on that bit. Probably Gemin's doing? Hard to say. Lucky numbers 7, 243, 9356.
==== Cherama ====
Right. There's no pretty way to put this. You are going to lose your job. Lucky numbers 8, 0, 14.

==== Xylak ====
In darkest night does Opthal shine brightest. A single, bold, columnar ray from the sky. 'Tis for you to guide your friends along the darkest of paths. Hold them to the straight and narrow, and give unto them the greatest reward (noodles). Lucky numbers 9725, 72, 9005.

==== Pharmakot ====
Under the sea lies the arc of Kyprius, he who sacrificed his all that his world might live on. None could expect such a grand sacrifice from any single soul, and thou must stop feeling like such a thing is your responsibility. The world is built on an arc of a million million tiny sacrifices. It's okay to give just a little. Lucky numbers 53, 8, 472.
==== Arkouda ====
Miraculous. Thou art as soft and cuddly and comforting to all the world around as when first were you stitched from cloth and clad in fur. Thine kin value you greatly. E'en princesses in high towers hold you close at hand. Lucky numbers 8, 362, 7.
==== Kypello ====
Heaven's light is far from your side, but you have ever thrived best in the darkness. Just remember to get some sun 'pon the rise of the First Light. Lucky numbers 1, 7, 8
==== Xiphos ====
Oh, you haven't seen Princess of the Dragons? Buddy, your horoscope for the week is to watch the best fantasy film franchise in this and maybe even in all possible realities. Lucky numbers 7, 263, 0.